When Obedience Breaks Your Heart

Scripture: Jeremiah 20:7–9

“I am in derision daily, every one mocketh me.” — Jeremiah 20:7

We sometimes imagine that doing God’s will brings a sense of peace that shields us from emotional pain. But Jeremiah’s experience tells a different story.

Jeremiah was called to deliver an unwelcome message to people who didn’t want to hear it. His faithfulness brought ridicule, rejection, and suffering. The very people he sought to warn became the source of his anguish. Eventually, the emotional burden became almost unbearable.

Jeremiah confessed that he had considered abandoning his prophetic ministry altogether. He would simply stop speaking in God’s name. But he couldn’t. “His word was in mine heart as a burning fire shut up in my bones, and I was weary with forbearing, and I could not stay” (Jeremiah 20:9).

What an extraordinary confession! Jeremiah was weary of speaking, yet he could find no rest in remaining silent. Obedience was painful, but disobedience was unbearable. His struggle was not between loving God and rejecting God. It was between the pain of obedience and the desire to escape that pain.

There is something deeply comforting in Jeremiah’s honesty. He didn’t pretend that rejection didn’t hurt. He didn’t conceal his discouragement behind a mask of spiritual confidence. He poured out his anguish before God. And God did not cease to use him because he was hurting.

Perhaps we need to reconsider what spiritual strength looks like. Faithfulness does not mean we never become discouraged. Courage does not mean we never experience fear. And obedience does not mean we never question how much more we can endure. Sometimes the most faithful servant is the one who continues obeying while struggling to hold back the tears.

But there is another danger. Pain can make us bitter toward the very people God has called us to serve. We must guard against allowing rejection to turn our hearts against those who reject us. We cannot always choose the cost of obedience, but we can choose whether suffering will harden our hearts or deepen our dependence upon God.

Something to Consider

Have you ever mistaken the emotional pain of doing what is right for evidence that you must be doing something wrong?

Obedience does not always spare us a broken heart. Sometimes it is through a broken heart that God uncovers the motivation of our faithfulness.

–PGR